#OperationGirl Charity Challenge by John Legend, Ryot & Burkle Global Impact Initiative

We're super excited to let you know that we're part of the #OperationGirl Charity Challenge, a fundraising campaign launched by John Legend, RYOT and the Burkle Global Impact Initiative.

To give back, they will be donating $100,000 to organizations like ours focused on women and girls. The charity that raises the most throughout the Challenge will get a $50,000 donation. Second place gets $20,000, third gets $10,000.

We're out to raise as much money as possible for our cause so we can win the $50,000 grand prize donation.

We think we can win and to do so, we definitely need your help. We'll be sending emails throughout the Challenge and we'll be asking for you to give. Every donation makes a difference, no matter how small. Every dollar counts.

To help now, please CLICK HERE and give whatever you can.

Or, if you want to go one step further, GO HERE and click 'Fundraise for This Campaign.' In seconds, you'll have your own fundraiser that you can share with all of your family and friends so that you can raise money for our cause too.

Please email CrowdRise at OperationGirl@CrowdRise.com if you have any questions at all and they'll help solve everything.

Thanks so much for your support!

Hope House

A Day In the Life: Women's Advocate

Our guest blogger today is Lori, a Hope House Women's Advocate.

As a Women’s Advocate here at Hope House, I have many different roles.  No day—or hour for that matter—is ever the same. 

Today when I came into work, I spent the first few hours providing general support to the women and children who reside in shelter: 

• helped a client her medications
• helped a client take her child’s temperature
• put new sheets on the beds for an incoming family
• assisted a group of clients in working out a laundry schedule

Advocate answers the hotline.
Photo by nota @ sxc.hu

In the midst of all of that, I answered the 24-hour hotline, which is where most women first access Hope House services.  The woman on the hotline told me that her husband is verbally and physically abusive towards her. Her husband has been drinking tonight and she knows that she and her children are not safe staying at home. We make arrangements to bring them in to shelter.

When this woman and her children arrived in shelter, I made sure they had something to eat, and that they had no immediate medical needs. Then, I completed an intake process with her where I gathered general information about her situation and needs.

Tomorrow, I will meet with her again to provide her with information about power and control, red flags, the cycle of domestic violence, and safety planning.

I spend the next couple of hours of my shift meeting individually with the women who are assigned to my caseload.  During these individual meetings, I assist the women in recognizing their personal strengths and in setting goals. I provide a variety of resources and information to empower the women to make progress towards their personal goals.

No two days are ever the same in shelter, so I have learned to be very flexible. Although working as a Women’s Advocate can at times be a busy job, being able to provide support and assistance to the women in shelter is my passion. It’s most definitely a rewarding job!

Lethality Assessment Program

In May we were able to work with the Safe Family Coalition to deliver cookies to all of the police officers that have been a part of the Lethality Assessment Project (LAP) as a way to say thank you for their commitment to those who are impacted by domestic violence.

The LAP was started as a pilot project with the cities of Lee’s Summit, Grandview, Raytown and Kansas City police departments. The police partner with the local domestic violence agency in carrying out the program, which is based on research on lethality for battered women.

The program is simple: when police respond to a domestic violence scene, they ask the victim a series of research-based questions. The way the victim answers these questions can determine the level of lethality for that victim. Based on the answers, the police officers will talk to the victims about safety and the concern that they have for the victim.

The officers then call our hotline and speak to an advocate with the goal of getting the victim to speak to the advocate. They will safety plan, discuss resources - such as shelter - and to make a follow up appointment to further discuss the situation.

The program has worked extremely well. The pilot project ended in October of 2009, but all participating departments have continued with the program. We have also added the Blue Springs police department to the list of participating departments.

We know that only 3% of domestic violence homicide victims had ever availed themselves to services prior to their deaths. We, as DV programs, have worked to reach this group of victims but have not had much success. Through this program, we are able to reach this very high risk group of people.

We are grateful for the participation of all of the police departments, the administration and the officers that complete the surveys. With the support of the officers on the street, we are working to save lives.

Does a Victim Ever Feel Safe?

I am often asked if a victim of domestic violence ever feels safe. From my perspective the answer isn’t a simple one - just like everything else with domestic violence. The hard truth is that many survivors of domestic violence do not ever fully feel safe. They take steps to protect themselves and to free themselves from their abuser, but are constantly looking over their shoulders and always on alert.

If children are involved there can be a level of fear the entire time the parents have to have interaction regarding the children. Children can be used as a means of control and if custody orders require visits then interaction can be frequent and the level of fear more constant.

Women have fled their home states and moved across the country only to be found and the torment to start again. The feeling of safety ebbs away even more each time a phone number has to be changed or relocation is necessary. Even work can be a place of fear if the abuser knows the location and waits in the parking lot for his current or former partner to walk to her car at lunch or after work.

Women have told me that they only felt safe while their abuser was in prison or after their abuser passed away. Only then did the feeling of safety truly come to them.

Yes, some survivors of domestic violence are able to feel safe and go about their lives without the feeling of constant fear. I am happy for them and thankful for whatever part Hope House or other services might have played in helping that become a reality.

The sad fact is that the level of fear can depend on the abuser and his willingness to stop the abuse. Is he willing to stop tormenting her and let her live her life in peace? The responsibility lies with the abuser, not the victim. His actions, and the level at which he is held accountable for those actions, make all the difference.

Go Green

 

How can you have a direct and positive impact on the lives of thousands of women and children you may never meet? By going green, you can give green (funds) to support the daily operations of Hope House.

We have partnered with Global Re-Source Funding (GRF) and we’re delighted to offer the opportunity for businesses, schools, churches and other organizations to collect recyclables to support our services and programs for victims of domestic violence.

By collecting inkjet and laser/toner cartridges, cell phones, laptops, GPS devices, digital cameras and iPods, you will be raising money to help Hope House create a safe environment and supportive services for the thousands of  victims of domestic violence who take advantage of these services each year.

The best part of this program is that you can support Hope House simply by asking for a donation of items (not cash!) that most people discard anyway. Your impact can be substantial. Here’s a partial list of the donation Hope House can receive for your recyclables:

Inkjet cartridge: $4

Toner/laser cartridge: $12

Laptop: $35

Cell phones/iPods: $100

GRF provides free recycle bins and marketing materials. They will deliver the bin(s) to you, and will pick them up when they’re full. It couldn’t be easier for you to help us!

Simply contact Lee at Hope House at 816-257-9363 or lmarlin@hopehouse.net, or go to GRF’s website (http://www.globalre-sourcefunding.com/) to sign up directly.

From all of us at Hope House and Global Re-Source Funding, thank you for going green and giving green (cash, through GRF’s donation back to Hope House!) to support our mission to break the cycle of domestic violence.  

Happy New Year

Happy New Year!! 2011 is just two days away, and we are gearing up for it to be a great year.

We are so excited to be planning our grand opening for the new therapy building and for all of the renovations and changes that have happened on the Independence campus. It is a beautiful, calming atmosphere; a perfect environment for healing to take place.

We continue to be forward thinking in our plans for this year. We will continue to enhance our programming through grants that we have received. It is so exciting to be able to hire back staff and enhance the quality of our programming. We have been operating at lower staffing levels but continuing to have increased demand. This can take a toll on the staff, to be able to provide relief for them is such a thrill.

Last year we turned away more than we served in shelter; hopefully this year will be different. We will continue to offer services to as many as we can through all of our programming and minimize the numbers who are turned away. We will continue to advocate at the state and national level to make sure that the needs of those impacted by domestic violence are heard and addressed.

We remain positive that our work is making a difference in the lives of women and children. I heard from a former resident not too long ago who said, “Hope House saved me.” I said, “No, you saved yourself. We just helped.” I plan to continue to offer services that help women in their journey to reclaim themselves and move on to lives free of abuse.

I hope you will stay with me on this journey as we see what 2011 brings for us.

Violence Against Women Act (VAWA)

We are celebrating the 16^th anniversary of the Violence Against Women Act of 1994 (VAWA). It is a federal law that was first signed by President Clinton on September13, 1994. VAWA was reauthorized by Congress in 2000, and again in December 2005. It is up for reauthorization in 2011.

VAWA was developed as a result of concerned groups of prosecutors, law enforcement, victim advocates and the courts coming together and urging Congress to adopt legislation that would address the issue of domestic violence. Since it originally passed in 1994, the focus has expanded from domestic violence to include dating violence, sexual assault, and stalking.

The intent of VAWA is to improve the way communities work together to address the issue of domestic violence. It was adopted to combine new penalties to prosecute offenders while also implementing programs to address the victim’s needs.

By requiring a coordinated community response (CCR), VAWA makes communities talk to each other and work together to ensure there is a safety net of services provided for victims and a coordinated response to the perpetrator.

This CCR is actually one of the greatest successes of VAWA. This type of collaboration didn’t exist before and the needs of the victims of domestic violence were not being addressed as quickly and efficiently as they are now.

We have always known that domestic violence is not a family issue. It is a community issue and it takes the entire community working together to really make a difference in the lives of those impacted by domestic violence. Thank you to our members of Congress who continue to understand and support the needs of victims by the continued passage and support of VAWA. 

Safe Family Coalition

Domestic violence and child abuse often occur together. Before 2001 there were many agencies that addressed each of these problems as separate issues. At times, these agencies seemed to work against each other, potentially putting women and children in greater danger of harm.

To address this problem, the Jackson County Safe Family Coalition (SFC) was formed. Their mission is to provide a coordinated community response to child abuse and domestic violence that will provide safety, enhance well-being, and provide stability for children and families.

SFC is made up of the many agencies that are involved when domestic violence and child abuse occur together:

• child protection workers
• adult and family courts
• county and city prosecutors
• judges
• domestic violence shelters
• law enforcement
• probation and parole
• social workers
• mental health services providers

SFC has challenged all of the participating agencies to look at our systems and change operations with the SFC mission as a guide. The best way to keep children safe is to keep the non-offending parent safe. This is accomplished by:

• Holding the perpetrator accountable for their actions.
• Providing meaningful help, support, and services for families who are experiencing child abuse and domestic violence.
• Providing legal interventions and services that stop violence and abuse.

SFC has committed to educate agencies and their staffs about resources that are available when they recognize cases of domestic violence with child abuse. SFC also seeks to engage the community by creating awareness about the need to provide a comprehensive array of services that will respond to the unique strengths and concerns of families.

Hope House has been a proud partner of this coalition and will continue coming to the table to keep children and the non-offending parent safe. We are very grateful that so many partners have joined us to make a difference in our communities.

For more information about the Safe Family Coalition, please visit their website http://www.jcsafefamily.org/.

Survivor Treatment Group

Hope House offers a 12 week Survivor Treatment Group to battered women who are out of their abusive relationships for at least three months and attempting to put their lives back together. 

Abusers’ tactics of verbal and emotional abuse reinforce a negative perception of self. The victim begins to see herself as her abuser defines her. She loses her self-identity. The focus of the Survivor Treatment Group is the recovery of a sense of self. We help the client to define her own beliefs, validate her own feelings and develop a healthy regard for her self worth. This allows the client to transform herself from victim to survivor to thriver.

There are five topics addressed with two weeks devoted to each topic. Participants explore issues in their own lives relating to the topic discussed.

Week 1: “I’m Okay, You’re Okay.” A look at power and control in abusive relationships.  Why does it happen? How does it happen?

Week 3: “How Did this Happen to Me?” A look at our own personalities. Where did we get our life ‘tapes’? How did my ‘tapes’ allow me to remain in an abusive relationship?

Week 5: “Whose Fence is this Anyway?”  Establishing healthy boundaries. A look at what boundaries really are and what role they play in establishing and maintaining healthy relationships.

Week 7: “The Secret to it All – Loving Myself.” A look at self-esteem. How do I get there? Tools to help me stop beating myself up.

Week 9: “Letting the World Know I Love Myself.” A look at assertiveness and tools for healthy communication.

Week 11: “Putting it all Together – Letting it all Go.” Putting all the previous information together to let go of the past and start over with power in the present moment.

To get more information about joining this group, call our hotline at 816-461-HOPE (4673).

My Lilith Fair Experience

Sarah McLachlan presents MaryAnne
Metheny with a $4000 check.

I was lucky enough to represent Hope House at the Lilith Fair last week at the Capital Federal Park at Sandstone. 

As we’ve discussed in recent blogs, $1 from every ticket sold to the Kansas City Lilith Fair as given Hope House, who was chosen through a Choose Your Charity contest on Facebook. We received $4,000 to help us in our mission to break the cycle of domestic violence.


See our Lilith Fair pictures here.

Lilith Fair and its organizer Sarah McLachlan have been receiving negative publicity and questions regarding the necessity of Lilith Fair and if it makes sense to do it again after such a long hiatus.

Times have changed since the last Lilith Fair but does that mean it shouldn’t happen again? Yes, ticket sales are down and some tour sites have had to be cancelled, but that is happening to all concerts, unfortunately. I wish the economy was better and that people had more disposable income that they could use for entertainment such as the Lilith Fair.

It was an incredible experience and I feel sad that more people were not there to take part in it. Everyone else missed out on an amazing experience and remarkable music. In an interview on NPR, Sarah McLachlan said “it is not about ticket sales, it's about the experience of Lilith — about artists getting together to make this world a better place.”

In the same interview Sarah said, "that's one of my greatest passions: women and children. Anybody who doesn't have their own voice, or doesn't know how to reach out and have their own voice and help themselves in a bad situation. And, yes, there's a lot of horrible things going on all over the world, but as individuals, I think we all have to focus on our own gifts and our own values and bring those forth to the world the best we can.”

How perfect for Hope House to be the recipient of funds from an organization with such passion and concern for women and children. I have always felt that the mission of Hope House is to help women find their voice after it has been lost or taken away. How inspiring that Sarah feels the same way and through her advocacy and her willingness to work hard, she has helped us to do that.

I appreciate her focusing her gift of music to help others and feel incredibly fortunate that we were chosen to be Lilith’s charity. It was a wonderful experience and I would say to the naysayers: go to the concert, enjoy and don’t inject negativity into a group of people who are trying to make a difference in our world.

Lilith Fair Helps Hope House

Our guest blogger this week is Lee Marlin, Director of Marketing for Hope House.

Don’t you need a vacation day? I suggest taking off Thursday of this week (7/15) and spending the day celebrating women in music at the Lilith Fair Tour at Capital Federal Park at Sandstone. 

The show starts at 2:30pm and goes til 11pm. If you can’t take the day off, go after work; there’ll still be a lot of amazing music waiting for you.

Hope House was chosen as the winner of Lilith’s Choose Your Charity promotion. That means Hope House will receive $1 for every ticket purchased. Sandstone has a capacity of 18,000. My mind boggles when I think of what Hope House could do with $18,000! We’re sure hoping for a sell-out! Get your tickets now at http://lilithfair.com.

A few of the acts at the Kansas City stop include Sarah McLachlan, Heart, Emmylou Harris, Courtyard Hounds (2/3 of the Dixie Chicks), and locals Sara Swenson and Julia Othmer.

Lilith organizer Sarah McLachlan will be on-hand to perform, and to present the check to Hope House CEO MaryAnne Metheny. How exciting is that?!

The purchase of one ticket can support Hope House and women in music (and get you out of the office with a chance to work on your tan)… it’s a no-brainer. Hope to see you there.

Lilith Fair to Donate $1 Per Ticket Sold in Kansas City

This week's guest blogger is Lee Marlin, Director of Marketing for Hope House.

Hope House receives funding from a variety of the obvious sources like government grants, area businesses, organizations, and individuals. But we're always on the lookout for less obvious opportunities.

WHAT IS THE LILITH FAIR TOUR?

The Lilith Fair Tour, a celebration of women in music, is coming to KC in July. $1 from every ticket sold in Kansas City will be donated to the local charity with the most votes. That's where you come in...

VOTE ON FACEBOOK

This link takes you to the Lilith Fair site where you can see that Hope House is currently in the lead! But we need your help to cement that lead. Please click through and vote for Hope House. You must be a member of Facebook, but you don't have to live in Kansas City. You just have to care about the women and children we help every day.

The 2 minutes it takes you to vote could mean up to $18,000 (the capacity of Capital Federal Park @ Sandstone) for Hope House operations.

NEED MORE INCENTIVE?

If Hope House wins, singer and Lilith organizer Sarah McLachlan will personally present a check for the amount raised to Hope House CEO MaryAnne Metheny during the show in Kansas City!