Point In Time Survey

The National Network Against Domestic Violence (NNEDV) has released the results from their 5th annual Point In Time Study. This study is done once a year, to calculate the number of people across the country who are receiving domestic violence services on a given day (September 15, 2010).

This study gives us the opportunity to talk about the need in our country, and to highlight the services that are offered. It also allows us to see the unmet need and what work still needs to be done. This gives us information to discuss with our elected officials in order to address the needs of a very vulnerable population.

The national numbers are astounding to comprehend:

• 70,648 victims across the country received safe shelter.
• 33,129 received non-residential services.
• 23,522 hotline calls were answered
• 9,541 requests for services were unmet.

In Missouri on that day:

• 2,114 victims found safety in emergency shelters or transitional housing.
• 740 adults and children received non-residential services including groups and individual counseling.
• 286 people across the state were turned away due to lack of capacity.

Reports from the other programs were consistent with what we are seeing at Hope House: the economy has definitely impacted the number of people seeking services and resources in the community are down. The need continues to be overwhelming across our country.

The NNEDV website (www.nnedv.org ) reports: Across the nation on September 15, 2010, three women were murdered by their intimate partners. 36 babies were born to mothers living in domestic violence shelters. 391 survivors started new jobs. Three men committed suicide – one after murdering his wife, another after a failed attempt to kill his girlfriend, and the third after holding his partner hostage and a standoff with the police.

So we continue to be challenged by the ever increasing need, and we will continue to rise above the challenge and meet the needs of those we serve.

Legislative Breakfast

L-R Missouri Representatives Brent Lasater,
Jeff Grisamore, Noel Torpey, Ira Anders

Hope House hosted a breakfast for our recently installed legislators on January 28th. We had the opportunity to meet our new representatives and re-engage with those who have been in office. 

I love having their undivided attention to discuss what is happening at Hope House. It's a chance for us to say thank you for all that they do for their communities as well as to highlight the work we do, and the obstacles and challenges facing our clients.

We are able to advocate on our client’s behalf and to ensure that their needs are heard. We are extremely fortunate in Eastern Jackson County to have such wonderful representation and concern from our legislators. This is a difficult time for legislators facing another year of budget challenges and having to balance the needs of so many. I appreciate their willingness to come to the table and to hear our concerns.

I want to thank, Representatives Anders, Grisamore, Lasater, McManus, and Torpey; and Senator Kraus for taking time out of their busy schedules to attend our breakfast and tour our facility. I look forward to meeting with them throughout the year as we advocate for those who have been impacted by domestic violence.

Winter Weather

 

With crazy winter weather this year, we at Hope House must be very aware of all the things that can go wrong which can have a huge impact on our clients living in shelter and those coming to us for services. We implement emergency contingencies and go into hyper-planning mode to ensure that we are prepared if the worst case scenario happens. 

First and foremost, our responsibility is to those who are living with us and depend on us for their shelter and daily living needs. With school closings, we need to be prepared with enough food, as we’ll have the children here all day and will be feeding more than we normally would on a weekday.  

We need to have back up plans for electrical outages and emergency staffing plans for those who are working in shelter and those who cannot get in to relieve them. We do intakes and proceed as any other day, just like any other 24-hour facility. 

Our shelter and facilities staff outdid themselves this past storm. I am so appreciative of all of them and the way they handled the situation. They approached it with enthusiasm and determination. Shelter staff prepared themselves to stay for the long haul, and stay they did, doing 24+ hour shifts. They were real troopers. 

Facilities staff came in with shovels and the wonderful snow blowers that we received from our donors. They went to work first on the cars of the shelter staff so that they could go home as relief had arrived, then they went to work on the parking lots and sidewalks so people could get around.  

I am grateful to every one of them for their efforts and their dedication. They truly are heroes in my book.  We can’t stop doing what we do because of the weather and I am grateful for the staff who keep it all going.

Valentine's Day

Next week many people will hear from their significant other how much they are loved and how much they are appreciated. This will be shown with flowers, candy and perhaps a romantic dinner out. Of course, I am talking about celebrating Valentine's Day.

This is a wonderful holiday to celebrate with your loved one and to show them how much you care. However, this can be an extremely difficult holiday for those who have been experiencing domestic violence. The presence of flowers can have a different meaning if the only time you ever receive flowers is after a beating. What if the person who professes to love you also beats you? Calls you horrible names? Forces you to do things you don’t want to do?

 For those who are in our shelter and outreach services, we work to make this day special by celebrating our uniqueness and our special value as individuals. We work with clients to accept who they are and to work through where they have been. We help them dig down deep inside and find that person who is special and worthy of love - especially their own self-love.

When you have been a victim of abuse you can lose your love for yourself. You learn to believe the things that were said about you - that you are unlovable and unworthy of anyone’s love, not even your own. For if you were worth something and lovable, then your partner would not have had to beat you, right? (Of course not! The responsibility of the abuse lies with the abuser, not the victim.)

I ask that as you celebrate Valentine's Day next week, you pause and remember the women and children who are in shelter and services at Hope House. They are working hard to recover from their experiences of abuse, hoping to find themselves and to love themselves again.

Knowing that someone reclaimed themselves and found their voice to profess their self worth and their worthiness of love is the best Valentine's Day present I can receive.

(Note: If you'd like to be a part of a Valentine's Day present we're working on for the women in our shelter, please visit our website www.hopehouse.net.)

 

Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month

 

February is Teen Dating Violence Awareness and Prevention Month. Many people don’t realize that domestic violence impacts not only adults, but young people as well.

One in three teens will experience violence in their dating relationships. The abuse experienced by teens is similar to the abuse experienced by adults, including physical, sexual, and emotional abuse, and intimidation. Girls and young women between the ages of 16 and 24 experience the highest rate of intimate partner violence, at a rate almost triple the national average.

Teens are not always able to talk about the abuse to trusted adults in their lives. This can be due to a variety of factors including not acknowledging the signs of abuse, fear, embarrassment and fearing they wouldn’t be believed.

A teen’s confusion about the law and the desire for confidentiality are two of the most significant barriers to young victims of violence seeking help.

We must work together to bring attention to the issue of teen dating violence. To do that, we need to provide resources and education to the young people who are experiencing violence. We need to understand the dynamics of domestic violence, recognize it when it happens, and offer interventions. These steps are essential if we are to ever break the cycle.

For more resources regarding teen dating violence there are many websites available. Statistics for this blog came from http://www.teendvmonth.org/. You can also visit http://www.breakthecycle.org/ and the Hope House website http://www.hopehouse.net/ for more information.

Civil Legal Assistance Program

January, 2011 marks the 10 year anniversary of the Hope House Civil Legal Assistance Program. 

In January, 2001, Hope House hired a full-time paralegal and began contracting with a full-time attorney, Mary Weir, to represent victims of domestic violence in civil legal matters.  Over the last ten years the legal program has represented thousands of women in obtaining orders of protection, custody of their children, child support, divorces, name changes, and in other civil legal matters. 

Throughout this ten year period, the program has been primarily funded from a grant through the Office on Violence Against Women (OVW).  However, there were actually two years when the OVW funding didn’t come through and Hope House, recognizing the immense need for direct legal services, managed to continue the program on its own. 

While Ms. Weir has continued on as the contract attorney over the ten year period, there were also times when the funding permitted Hope House to expand the program to two full-time attorneys and extra support staff.  Hope House is happy to announce that we are in the process of once again adding a second attorney and our paralegal of eight years, Shannon Pollard, continues in her full-time position. 

In addition to the direct legal representation the legal program provides, the contract attorney also successfully argued to the Missouri Supreme Court in 2004 for the protection of the identity and records of all persons served by domestic violence agencies in Missouri.

Frequently, the legal program receives comments or letters from women expressing their gratitude for helping them obtain safety, security and empowerment in the face of a daunting legal system.  We know that this program has not only changed women and children's lives, it has saved them.     

Stalking Awareness Month

January 2011 marks the 8^th annual Stalking Awareness Month. During the month of January programs will bring awareness to the issue of stalking and what people can do to stop it.

3.4 million people are stalked in this country each year. Often the perception is that it is celebrities that are stalked by crazed fans. While this does happen, it is not the majority of stalking cases. Three out of four victims know their stalker. Nearly one third of victims are stalked by a current or former spouse or girl/boy friend.

The impact of stalking takes many forms but the emotional and physical toll on the victims is tremendous. The constant threat of someone following you, watching your moves and threatening you places a heavy toll on stalking victims. People who are stalked are always afraid and constantly looking over their shoulders. It is difficult to find peace and rest when fear is always present.

• 46% of stalking victims fear not knowing what will happen next.
• 29% of stalking victims fear the stalking will never stop.
• The prevalence of anxiety, insomnia, social dysfunction, and severe depression is much higher among stalking victims than the general population, especially if the stalking involves being followed or having one’s property destroyed.
• 2/3 of stalkers pursue their victims at least once per week, many daily.
• 78% of stalkers use more than one means of approach.

If you know someone who is being stalked or you are a victim, there are resources available. A great resource is the Stalking Resource Center at www.ncvc.org and also at www.stalkingawarenessmonth.org. As always, Hope House can help answer questions and assist with safety planning. Our 24-hour hotline 816-461-HOPE (4673) is always available.

 

Source: The Stalking Resource Center. (June 2009) Stalking Fact Sheet 2Tjaden, P., & Thoennes, N. (1998). Stalking in America: Findings from the National Violence Against Women survey. National Institute of Justice and Centers for Disease Control and Prevention Research in Brief. Washington, DC: U.S. Department