It's No Laughing Matter: Part II

Last week, Hope House introduced Part I of our new #ItsNoLaughingMatter campaign as part of the 2014 #GivingTuesday (click here if you missed it).

Here is another “joke” mocking victims of domestic violence.

Posts and comments like this are starting to become all too common today. In order to help society understand that domestic violence is no laughing matter, Hope House is sharing advocate stories leading up to #GivingTuesday on December 2.

This week, we wanted to share a story from Brittny:

“During a group session at Hope House, one of the clients shared her story. She got into an argument with her ex-boyfriend after he broke into her home. She ran away for help, and in the process he shot her twice. After that, he pulled her into his car and drove off. Not knowing what he was going to do next, she risked it, opened the truck door and jumped out at 70 miles per hour. She didn’t have any other options.  It’s real.”

Notice this story was between an ex-boyfriend and the victim. Violence is 75 percent more prevalent after the victim leaves. On #GivingTuesday, December 2nd, please stand with Hope House to show domestic violence is no laughing matter. You can stand with us today by forwarding this to others. Help spread the word about domestic violence.

Can't wait to give until #GivingTuesday? Give now HERE!

It's No Laughing Matter: Part I

What’s sad is the fact that Hope House found this online as part of a satirical social media page.

From now to #GivingTuesday, December 2, Hope House would like to present the real side of domestic violence. Too many jokes are made these days of domestic violence. But, our advocates see the pain and hardship of it every day.

Take Stefanie for instance. She is an advocate who visited the hospital several times as part of Hope House’s BridgeSPAN program. View her story below:

“It was the middle of the night. The pager went off, so I responded to one of our hospitals. When I got there, the female victim was there on the hospital bed sitting upright. I greeted her and the police officer with a smile. Shortly after introducing myself and hearing her story, the doctor came in. He proceeded to take out a staple-gun to close the gash in her head where her husband had hit her with something similar to a baton. I’ve never seen something like that before and never want to again.”

As part of Hope House’s #GivingTuesday campaign, we are asking you to stand up and show that you know domestic violence is real. Hope House will spend $3,660 to pay for 122 bed stays in our shelter on #GivingTuesday. Please help us December 2 (Can't wait until then? Give now by clicking here)!  

Marti Hill

I had the extreme pleasure of meeting a very courageous, warm and inviting woman. Joyce Layman Blackburn introduced me to Marti Hill so I could hear her story and offer resources for their joint project the Living Proof website.

Marti is an amazing woman. She has survived so much and has become a pioneer and advocate for those who are experiencing trauma, pain and loss. Marti’s story is not one of domestic violence, but she has so much to say that can impact those who are experiencing domestic violence. Her desire is to help everyone and she realized that she couldn’t do it alone, so she set about gathering people around her who could help. She had a dream to use her trauma and victimization and turn it into something positive that would help inspire others and promote healing.

Marti was viciously attacked on September 8, 2010 by Brian Pennington. Brian had done home repair work for Marti and Marti’s mother. Early one morning, Brian drove to Marti’s house on the pretense of showing her some more work that he found still needed to be done on her house. Instead, he viciously attacked her and left her for dead in the basement of her home.

It is a miracle that Marti is alive. Her injuries were so severe that, if it hadn’t been for her caring co-workers who became concerned when she didn’t show for work and called for a wellness check, Marti most likely would not be alive today. Marti has embraced this miracle and is committed to creating something positive out of a horrific situation. I applaud Marti for her courage, her commitment to helping others and her willingness to turn tragedy into hope.

Marti’s story was highlighted on CBS 48 Hours on February 2, 2013. She has much to offer to those who are in need or who want to be inspired by her story of survival. To learn more about Marti’s story and who she is, visit her website martihill.com. I know you will be as impressed with Marti as I am.

Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT)

This photo is a representation only.  It is not an actual client.

Today’s guest blogger is Janet Howard, a therapist at Hope House.

I have been a therapist at Hope House for eight years. About three years ago I discovered the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT). In EFT, we use our fingertips and tap on specific meridian points to realign the body’s natural energy centers. This allows the memory to be healed, and the body’s energy to be realigned.

I know it sounds fantastic and something right out of a sci-fi movie, but believe me, if done correctly, healing from painful memories occurs in a matter of minutes.

Free from the emotional pain of the memory, the client can then reorganize their thought processes and move on with their life. Such was the case with Patty*. The first time I met Patty, she appeared to be afraid of taking up too much space. She sat in an almost fetal position.

She avoided eye contact and spoke so softly that I could barely hear her. She fidgeted with her fingers. Her fingernails were so short from biting them that they had scabs. Her eyes were lifeless. Her complexion was pasty, probably due to her latest overdose of medications.

She had been in psychological services since pre-adolescence, and had experienced domestic violence her whole life. Her hospitalizations for suicidal attempts were a normal part of her life. She practiced every type of self destructive behaviors I had ever known. Although she had spent years in therapy, she had never found lasting relief from her painful memories, or self destructive behaviors. She wanted to try EFT.

Over the following months we journeyed through her past and present, putting away old misery, pain, and fear-based ideas. Patty learned new healthy coping skills, and practiced EFT daily. She worked very hard to change, and save, her life.

Several months ago, as Patty sat in my office, we discussed how much she had changed her life. She had confidence and self love. She sat up straight, and had direct eye contact. Her eyes were clear and bright - full of promise and hope. She spoke with assurance and calm certainty. She could face life head on without fear.

She had outgrown her need for therapy in her life. She was enrolled in college, lived in her own apartment, and had a supportive group of friends. She had a future. She had a life.

*names have been changed